conduct in asking us round to his house； and then being out。 In the evening Carrie was engaged marking a half…dozen new collars I had purchased。 I'll back Carrie's marking against anybody's。 While I was drying them at the fire； and Carrie was rebuking me for scorching them； Cummings came in。
He seemed quite well again； and chaffed us about marking the collars。 I asked him if he had heard from Gowing； and he replied that he had not。 I said I should not have believed that Gowing could have acted in such an ungentlemanly manner。 Cummings said： 〃You are mild in your description of him； I think he has acted like a cad。〃
The words were scarcely out of his mouth when the door opened； and Gowing； putting in his head； said： 〃May I come in？〃 I said： 〃Certainly。〃 Carrie said very pointedly： 〃Well； you ARE a stranger。〃 Gowing said： 〃Yes； I've been on and off to Croydon during the last fortnight。〃 I could see Cummings was boiling over； and eventually he tackled Gowing very strongly respecting his conduct last Saturday week。 Gowing appeared surprised； and said： 〃Why； I posted a letter to you in the morning announcing that the party was 'off； very much off。'〃 I said： 〃I never got it。〃 Gowing； turning to Carrie； said： 〃I suppose letters sometimes MISCARRY； don't they； MRS。 Carrie？〃 Cummings sharply said： 〃This is not a time for joking。 I had no notice of the party being put off。〃 Gowing replied： 〃I told Pooter in my note to tell you； as I was in a hurry。 However； I'll inquire at the post…office； and we must meet again at my place。〃 I added that I hoped he would be present at the next meeting。 Carrie roared at this； and even Cummings could not help laughing。
February 10； Sunday。 … Contrary to my wishes； Carrie allowed Lupin to persuade her to take her for a drive in the afternoon in his trap。 I quite disapprove of driving on a Sunday； but I did not like to trust Carrie alone with Lupin； so I offered to go too。 Lupin said： 〃Now； that is nice of you； Guv。； but you won't mind sitting on the back…seat of the cart？〃
Lupin proceeded to put on a bright…blue coat that seemed miles too large for him。 Carrie said it wanted taking in considerably at the back。 Lupin said： 〃Haven't you seen a box…coat before？ You can't drive in anything else。〃
He may wear what he likes in the future； for I shall never drive with him again。 His conduct was shocking。 When we passed Highgate Archway； he tried to pass everything and everybody。 He shouted to respectable people who were walking quietly in the road to get out of the way； he flicked at the horse of an old man who was riding； causing it to rear； and； as I had to ride backwards； I was compelled to face a gang of roughs in a donkey…cart； whom Lupin had chaffed； and who turned and followed us for nearly a mile； bellowing； indulging in coarse jokes and laughter； to say nothing of occasionally pelting us with orange…peel。
Lupin's excuse … that the Prince of Wales would have to put up with the same sort of thing if he drove to the Derby … was of little consolation to either Carrie or myself。 Frank Mutlar called in the evening； and Lupin went out with him。
February 11。 … Feeling a little concerned about Lupin； I mustered up courage to speak to Mr。 Perkupp about him。 Mr。 Perkupp has always been most kind to me； so I told him everything； including yesterday's adventure。 Mr。 Perkupp kindly replied： 〃There is no necessity for you to be anxious； Mr。 Pooter。 It would be impossible for a son of such good parents to turn out erroneously。 Remember he is young； and will soon get older。 I wish we could find room for him in this firm。〃 The advice of this good man takes loads off my mind。 In the evening Lupin came in。
After our little supper； he said： 〃My dear parents； I have some news； which I fear will affect you considerably。〃 I felt a qualm come over me； and said nothing。 Lupin then said： 〃It may distress you … in fact； I'm sure it will … but this afternoon I have given up my pony and trap for ever。〃 It may seem absurd； but I was so pleased； I immediately opened a bottle of port。 Gowing dropped in just in time； bringing with him a large sheet； with a print of a tailless donkey； which he fastened against the wall。 He then produced several separate tails； and we spent the remainder of the evening trying blindfolded to pin a tail on in the proper place。 My sides positively ached with laughter when I went to bed。
February 12。 … In the evening I spoke to Lupin about his engagement with Daisy Mutlar。 I asked if he had heard from her。 He replied： 〃No； she promised that old windbag of a father of hers that she would not communicate with me。 I see Frank Mutlar； of course； in fact； he said he might call again this evening。〃 Frank called； but said he could not stop； as he had a friend waiting outside for him； named Murray Posh； adding he was quite a swell。 Carrie asked Frank to bring him in。
He was brought in； Gowing entering at the same time。 Mr。 Murray Posh was a tall； fat young man； and was evidently of a very nervous disposition； as he subsequently confessed he would never go in a hansom cab； nor would he enter a four…wheeler until the driver had first got on the box with his reins in his hands。
On being introduced； Gowing； with his usual want of tact； said： 〃Any relation to 'Posh's three…shilling hats'？〃 Mr。 Posh replied： 〃Yes； but please understand I don't try on hats myself。 I take no ACTIVE part in the business。〃 I replied： 〃I wish I had a business like it。〃 Mr。 Posh seemed pleased； and gave a long but most interesting history of the extraordinary difficulties in the manufacture of cheap hats。
Murray Posh evidently knew Daisy Mutlar very intimately from the way he was talking of her； and Frank said to Lupin once； laughingly： 〃If you don't look out； Posh will cut you out！〃 When they had all gone； I referred to this flippant conversation； and Lupin said； sarcastically： 〃A man who is jealous has no respect for himself。 A man who would be jealous of an elephant like Murray Posh could only have a contempt for himself。 I know Daisy。 She WOULD wait ten years for me； as I said before； in fact； if necessary； SHE WOULD WAIT TWENTY YEARS FOR ME。〃
CHAPTER XVI。
We lose money over Lupin's advice as to investment； so does Cummings。 Murray Posh engaged to Daisy Mutlar。
February 18。 … Carrie has several times recently called attention to the thinness of my hair at the top of my head； and recommended me to get it seen to。 I was this morning trying to look at it by the aid of a small hand…glass； when somehow my elbow caught against the edge of the chest of drawers and knocked the glass out of my hand and smashed it。 Carrie was in an awful way about it； as she is rather absurdly superstitious。 To make matters worse； my large photograph in the drawing…room fell during the night； and the glass cracked。
Carrie said： 〃Mark my words； Charles； some misfortune is about to happen。〃
I said： 〃Nonsense； dear。〃
In the evening Lupin arrived home early； and seemed a little agitated。 I said： 〃What's up； my boy？〃 He hesitated a good deal； and then said： 〃You know those Parachikka Chlorates I advised you to invest 20 pounds in？ I replied： 〃Yes； they are all right； I trust？〃 He replied： 〃Well； no！ To the surprise of everybody； they have utterly collapsed。〃
My breath was so completely taken away； I could say nothing。 Carrie looked at me； and said： 〃What did I tell you？〃 Lupin； after a while； said： 〃However； you are specially fortunate。 I received an early tip； and sold out yours immediately； and was fortunate to get 2 pounds for them。 So you get something after all。〃
I gave a sigh of relief。 I said： 〃I was not so sanguine as to suppose； as you predicted； that I should get six or eight times the amount of my investment； still a profit of 2 pounds is a good percentage for such a short time。〃 Lupin said； quite irritably： 〃You don't understand。 I sold your 20 pounds shares for 2 pounds； you therefore lose 18 pounds on the transaction； whereby Cummings and Gowing will lose the whole of theirs。〃
February 19。 … Lupin； before going to town； said： 〃I am very sorry about those Parachikka Chlorates； it would not have happened if the boss； Job Cleanands； had been in town。 Between ourselves； you must not be surprised if something goes wrong at our office。 Job Cleanands has not been seen the last few days； and it strikes me several people DO want to see him very particularly。〃
In the evening Lupin was just on the point of going out to avoid a collision with Gowing and Cummings； when the former entered the room； without knocking； but with his usual trick of saying； 〃May I come in？〃
He entered； and to the surprise of Lupin and myself； seemed to be in the very best of spirits。 Neither Lupin nor I broached the subject to him； but he did so of his own accord。 He said： 〃I say； those Parachikka Chlorates have gone an awful smash！ You're a nice one； Master Lupin。 How much do you lose？〃 Lupin； to my utter astonishment； said： 〃Oh！ I had nothing in them。 There was some informality in my application … I forgot to enclose the cheque or something； and I didn't get any。 The Guv。 loses 18 pounds。〃 I said： 〃I quite understood you were in it； or nothing would have induced me to speculate。〃 Lupin replied： 〃Well； it can't be helped； you must go double on the next tip。〃 Before I could reply； Gowing said： 〃Well； I lose nothing； fortunately。 From what I heard； I did not quite believe in them； so I persuaded Cummings to take my 15 pounds worth； as he had more faith in them than I had。〃
Lupin burst out laughing； and； in the most unseemly manner； said： 〃Alas； poor Cummings。 He'll lose 35 pounds。〃 At that moment there was a ring at the bell。 Lupin said： 〃I don't want to meet Cummings。〃 If he had gone out of the door he would have met him in the passage； so as quickly as possible Lupin opened the parlour window and got out。 Gowing jumped up suddenly； exclaiming： 〃I don't want to see him either！〃 and； before I could say a word； he followed Lupin out of the window。
For my own part； I was horrified to think my own son and one of my most intimate friends should depart from the house like a couple of interrupted burglars。 Poor Cummin