the dark flower- 第6部分

Without　quite　knowing　what　he　did；　he　bent　his　face　towards　the
hand　that　she　had　laid　on　his　sleeve；　then　knew　no　more；　having
fainted。


VIII


Growing　boyover…exertion　in　the　morning！　　That　was　all！　　He　was
himself　very　quickly；　and　walked　up　to　bed　without　assistance。
Rotten　of　him！　　Never　was　anyone　more　ashamed　of　his　little
weakness　than　this　boy。　　Now　that　he　was　really　a　trifle
indisposed；　he　simply　could　not　bear　the　idea　of　being　nursed　at
all　or　tended。　　Almost　rudely　he　had　got　away。　　Only　when　he　was　in
bed　did　he　remember　the　look　on　her　face　as　he　left　her。　　How
wistful　and　unhappy；　seeming　to　implore　him　to　forgive　her！　　As　if
there　were　anything　to　forgive！　　As　if　she　had　not　made　him
perfectly　happy　when　she　danced　with　him！　　He　longed　to　say　to　her：
〃If　I　might　be　close　to　you　like　that　one　minute　every　day；　then　I
don't　mind　all　the　rest！〃　　Perhaps　he　would　dare　say　that　to…
morrow。　　Lying　there　he　still　felt　a　little　funny。　　He　had
forgotten　to　close　the　ribs　of　the　blinds；　and　moonlight　was
filtering　in；　but　he　was　too　idle；　too　drowsy　to　get　up　now　and　do
it。　　They　had　given　him　brandy；　rather　a　lotthat　perhaps　was　the
reason　he　felt　so　queer；　not　ill；　but　mazy；　as　if　dreaming；　as　if
he　had　lost　the　desire　ever　to　move　again。　　Just　to　lie　there；　and
watch　the　powdery　moonlight；　and　hear　faraway　music　throbbing　down
below；　and　still　feel　the　touch　of　her；　as　in　the　dance　she　swayed
against　him；　and　all　the　time　to　have　the　scent　about　him　of
flowers！　　His　thoughts　were　dreams；　his　dreams　thoughtsall
precious　unreality。　　And　then　it　seemed　to　him　that　the　moonlight
was　gathered　into　a　single　slip　of　pallorthere　was　a　thrumming；　a
throbbing；　and　that　shape　of　moonlight　moved　towards　him。　　It　came
so　close　that　he　felt　its　warmth　against　his　brow；　it　sighed；
hovered；　drew　back　soundless；　and　was　gone。　　He　must　have　fallen
then　into　dreamless　sleep。　。　。　。

What　time　was　it　when　he　was　awakened　by　that　delicate　'rat…tat'　to
see　his　tutor　standing　in　the　door…way　with　a　cup　of　tea？

Was　young　Lennan　all　right？　　Yes；　he　was　perfectly　all　rightwould
be　down　directly！　　It　was　most　frightfully　good　of　Mr。　Stormer　to
come！　　He　really　didn't　want　anything。

Yes；　yes；　but　the　maimed　and　the　halt　must　be　attended　to！

His　face　seemed　to　the　boy　very　kind　just　thenonly　to　laugh　at
him　a　very　littlejust　enough。　　And　it　was　awfully　decent　of　him
to　have　come；　and　to　stand　there　while　he　drank　the　tea。　　He　was
really　all　right；　but　for　a　little　headache。　　Many　times　while　he
was　dressing　he　stood　still；　trying　to　remember。　　That　white　slip
of　moonlight？　　Was　it　moonlight？　　Was　it　part　of　a　dream；　or　was
it；　could　it　have　been　she；　in　her　moonlight…coloured　frock？　　Why
had　he　not　stayed　awake？　　He　would　not　dare　to　ask　her；　and　now
would　never　know　whether　the　vague　memory　of　warmth　on　his　brow　had
been　a　kiss。

He　breakfasted　alone　in　the　room　where　they　had　danced。　　There　were
two　letters　for　him。　　One　from　his　guardian　enclosing　money；　and
complaining　of　the　shyness　of　the　trout；　the　other　from　his　sister。
The　man　she　was　engaged　tohe　was　a　budding　diplomat；　attached　to
the　Embassy　at　Romewas　afraid　that　his　leave　was　going　to　be
curtailed。　　They　would　have　to　be　married　at　once。　　They　might　even
have　to　get　a　special　licence。　　It　was　lucky　Mark　was　coming　back
so　soon。　　They　simply　MUST　have　him　for　best　man。　　The　only
bridesmaid　now　would　be　Sylvia。　。　。　。　　Sylvia　Doone？　　Why；　she　was
only　a　kid！　　And　the　memory　of　a　little　girl　in　a　very　short
holland　frock；　with　flaxen　hair；　pretty　blue　eyes；　and　a　face　so
fair　that　you　could　almost　see　through　it；　came　up　before　him。　　But
that；　of　course；　was　six　years　ago；　she　would　not　still　be　in　a
frock　that　showed　her　knees；　or　wear　beads；　or　be　afraid　of　bulls
that　were　never　there。　　It　was　stupid　being　best　manthey　might
have　got　some　decent　chap！　　And　then　he　forgot　allfor　there　was
SHE；　out　on　the　terrace。　　In　his　rush　to　join　her　he　passed　several
of　the　'English　Grundys；'　who　stared　at　him　askance。　　Indeed；　his
conduct　of　the　night　before　might　well　have　upset　them。　　An　Oxford
man；　fainting　in　an　hotel！　　Something　wrong　there！　。　。　。

And　then；　when　he　reached　her；　he　did　find　courage。

〃Was　it　really　moonlight？〃

〃All　moonlight。〃

〃But　it　was　warm！〃

And；　when　she　did　not　answer　that；　he　had　within　him　just　the　same
light；　intoxicated　feeling　as　after　he　had　won　a　race　at　school。

But　now　came　a　dreadful　blow。　　His　tutor's　old　guide　had　suddenly
turned　up；　after　a　climb　with　a　party　of　Germans。　　The　war…horse
had　been　aroused　in　Stormer。　　He　wished　to　start　that　afternoon　for
a　certain　hut；　and　go　up　a　certain　peak　at　dawn　next　day。　　But
Lennan　was　not　to　go。　　Why　not？　　Because　of　last　night's　faint；　and
because；　forsooth；　he　was　not　some　stupid　thing　they　called　'an
expert。'　　As　if！　　Where　she　could　go　he　could！　　This　was　to　treat
him　like　a　child。　　Of　course　he　could　go　up　this　rotten　mountain。
It　was　because　she　did　not　care　enough　to　take　him！　　She　did　not
think　him　man　enough！　　Did　she　think　that　he　could　not　climb　what
her　husbandcould？　　And　if　it　were　dangerous　SHE　ought　not　to　be
going；　leaving　him　behindthat　was　simply　cruel！　　But　she　only
smiled；　and　he　flung　away　from　her；　not　having　seen　that　all　this
grief　of　his　only　made　her　happy。

And　that　afternoon　they　went　off　without　him。　　What　deep；　dark
thoughts　he　had　then！　　What　passionate　hatred　of　his　own　youth！
What　schemes　he　wove；　by　which　she　might　come　back；　and　find　him
gone…up　some　mountain　far　more　dangerous　and　fatiguing！　　If　people
did　not　think　him　fit　to　climb　with；　he　would　climb　by　himself。
That；　anyway；　everyone　admitted；　was　dangerous。　　And　it　would　be
her　fault。　　She　would　be　sorry　then。　　He　would　get　up；　and　be　off
before　dawn；　he　put　his　things　out　ready；　and　filled　his　flask。
The　moonlight　that　evening　was　more　wonderful　than　ever；　the
mountains　like　great　ghosts　of　themselves。　　And　she　was　up　there　at
the　hut；　among　them！　　It　was　very　long　before　he　went　to　sleep；
brooding　over　his　injuriesintending　not　to　sleep　at　all；　so　as　to
be　ready　to　be　off　at　three　o'clock。　　At　NINE　o'clock　he　woke。　　His
wrath　was　gone；　he　only　felt　restless　and　ashamed。　　If；　instead　of
flying　out；　he　had　made　the　best　of　it；　he　could　have　gone　with
them　as　far　as　the　hut；　could　have　stayed　the　night　there。　　And　now
he　cursed　himself　for　being　such　a　fool　and　idiot。　　Some　little　of
that　idiocy　he　could；　perhaps；　retrieve。　　If　he　started　for　the　hut
at　once；　he　might　still　be　in　time　to　meet　them　coming　down；　and
accompany　them　home。　　He　swallowed　his　coffee；　and　set　off。　　He
knew　the　way　at　first；　then　in　woods　lost　it；　recovered　the　right
track　again　at　last；　but　did　not　reach　the　hut　till　nearly　two
o'clock。　　Yes；　the　party　had　made　the　ascent　that　morningthey　had
been　seen；　been　heard　jodelling　on　the　top。　　Gewiss！　　Gewiss！　　But
they　would　not　come　down　the　same　way。　　Oh；　no！　　They　would　be
going　home　down　to　the　West　and　over　the　other　pass。　　They　would　be
back　in　house　before　the　young　Herr　himself。

He　heard　this；　oddly；　almost　with　relief。　　Was　it　the　long　walk
alone；　or　being　up　there　so　high？　　Or　simply　that　he　was　very
hungry？　　Or　just　these　nice　friendly　folk　in　the　hut；　and　their
young　daughter　with　her　fresh　face；　queer　little　black　cloth　sailor
hat　with　long　ribbons；　velvet　bodice；　and　perfect　simple　manners；
or　the　sight　of　the　little　silvery…dun　cows；　thrusting　their　broad
black　noses　against　her　hand？　　What　was　it　that　had　taken　away　from
him　all　his　restless　feeling；　made　him　happy　and　content？　。　。　。　　He
did　not　know　that　the　newest　thing　always　fascinates　the　puppy　in
its　gambols！　。　。　。　　He　sat　a　long　while　after　lunch；　trying　to　draw
the　little　cows；　watching　the　sun　on　the　cheek　of　that　pretty
maiden；　trying　to　talk　to　her　in　German。　　And　when　at　last　he　said：
〃Adieu！〃　and　she　murmured　〃Kuss　die　Hand。　　Adieu！〃　there　was　quite
a　little　pang　in　his　heart。　。　。　。　　Wonderful　and　queer　is　the　heart
of　a　man！　。　。　。　　For　all　that；　as　he　neared　home　he　hastened；　till
he　was　actually　running。　　Why　had　he　stayed　so　long　up　there？　　She
would　be　backshe　would　expect　to　see　him；　and　that　young　beast　of
a　violinist　would　be　with　her；　perhaps；　instead！　　He　reached　the
hotel　just　in　time　to　rush　up　and　dress；　and　rush　down　to　dinner。
Ah！　　They　were　tired；　no　doubtwere　resting　in　their　rooms。　　He
sat　through　dinner　as　best　he　could；　got　away　before　dessert；　and
flew　upstairs。　　For　a　minute　he　stood　there　doubtful；　on　which　door
should　he　knock？　　Then　timidly　he　tapped　on　hers。　　No　answer！　　He
knocked　loud　on　his　tutor's　door。　　No　answer！　　They　were　not　back；
then。　　Not　back？　　What　could　that　mean？　　Or　could　it　be　that　they
were　both　asleep？　　Once　more　he　knocked　on　her　door；　then
desperately　turned　the　handle；　and　took　a　flying　glance。　　Empty；
tidy；　untouched！　　Not　back！　　He　turned　and　ran　downstairs　again。
All　the　guests　were　streaming　out　from　dinner；　and　he　became
entangled　with　a　group　of　'English　Grundys'　discussing　a　climbing
accident　which　had　occurred　in　Switzerland。　　He　listened；　feeling
suddenly　quite　sick。　　One　of　them；　the　short　grey…bearded　Grundy
with　the　rather　whispering　voice；　said　to　him：　〃All　alone　again　to…
night？　　The　Stormers　not　back？〃　　Lennan　did　his　best　to　answer；　but
something　had　closed　his　throat；　he　could　only　shake　his　head。

〃They　had　a　guide；　I　think？〃　said　the　'English　Grundy。'

This　time　Lennan　managed　to　get　out：　〃Yes；　sir。〃

〃Stormer；　I　fancy；　is　quite　an　expert！〃　and　turning　to　the　lady
whom　the　young　'Grundys'　addressed　as　'Madre'　he　added：

〃To　me　the　great　charm　of　mountain…climbing　was　always　the　freedom
from　peoplethe　remoteness。〃

The　mother　of　the　young　'Grundys；'　looking　at　Lennan　with　her　half…
closed　eyes；　answered：

〃That；　to　me；　would　be　the　disadvantage；　I　always　like　to　be　mixing
with　my　own　kind。〃

The　grey…bearded　'Grundy'　murmured　in　a　muffled　voice：

〃Dangerous　thing；　that；　to　sayin　an　hotel！〃

And　they　went　on　talking；　but　of　what　Lennan　no　longer　knew；　lost
in　this　sudden　feeling　of　sick　fear。　　In　the　presence　of　these
'English　Grundys；'　so　superior　to　all　vulgar　sensations；　he　could