《the diary of an old soul》

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the diary of an old soul- 第4部分


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They dwell with me like things half come to pass;
True prophecies:when I with thee am right;
If I pray; waking; for such a joy of sight;
Thou with the gold; wilt not refuse the brass。

4。

I think I shall not ever pray for such;
Thy bliss will overflood my heart and brain;
And I want no unripe things back again。
Love ever fresher; lovelier than of old
How should it want its more exchanged for much?
Love will not backward sigh; but forward strain;
On in the tale still telling; never told。

5。

What has been; shall not only be; but is。
The hues of dreamland; strange and sweet and tender
Are but hint…shadows of full many a splendour
Which the high Parent…love will yet unroll
Before his child's obedient; humble soul。
Ah; me; my God! in thee lies every bliss
Whose shadow men go hunting wearily amiss。

6。

Now; ere I sleep; I wonder what I shall dream。
Some sense of being; utter new; may come
Into my soul while I am blind and dumb
With shapes and airs and scents which dark hours teem;
Of other sort than those that haunt the day;
Hinting at precious things; ages away
In the long tale of us God to himself doth say。

7。

Late; in a dream; an unknown lady I saw
Stand on a tomb; down she to me stepped thence。
〃They tell me;〃 quoth I; 〃thou art one of the dead!〃
And scarce believed for gladness the yea she said;
A strange auroral bliss; an arctic awe;
A new; outworldish joy awoke intense;
To think I talked with one that verily was dead。

8。

Thou dost demand our love; holy Lord Christ;
And batest nothing of thy modesty;
Thou know'st no other way to bliss the highest
Than loving thee; the loving; perfectly。
Thou lovest perfectlythat is thy bliss:
We must love like thee; or our being miss
So; to love perfectly; love perfect Love; love thee。

9。

Here is my heart; O Christ; thou know'st I love thee。
But wretched is the thing I call my love。
O Love divine; rise up in me and move me
I follow surely when thou first dost move。
To love the perfect love; is primal; mere
Necessity; and he who holds life dear;
Must love thee every hope and heart above。

10。

Might I but scatter interfering things
Questions and doubts; distrusts and anxious pride;
And in thy garment; as under gathering wings;
Nestle obedient to thy loving side;
Easy it were to love thee。 But when thou
Send'st me to think and labour from thee wide;
Love falls to asking many a why and how。

11。

Easier it were; but poorer were the love。
Lord; I would have me love thee from the deeps
Of troubled thought; of pain; of weariness。
Through seething wastes below; billows above;
My soul should rise in eager; hungering leaps;
Through thorny thicks; through sands unstable press
Out of my dream to him who slumbers not nor sleeps。

12。

I do not fear the greatness of thy command
To keep heart…open…house to brother men;
But till in thy God's love perfect I stand;
My door not wide enough will open。 Then
Each man will be love…awful in my sight;
And; open to the eternal morning's might;
Each human face will shine my window for thy light。

13。

Make me all patience and all diligence;
Patience; that thou mayst have thy time with me;
Diligence; that I waste not thy expense
In sending out to bring me home to thee。
What though thy work in me transcends my sense
Too fine; too high; for me to understand
I hope entirely。 On; Lord; with thy labour grand。

14。

Lest I be humbled at the last; and told
That my great labour was but for my peace
That not for love or truth had I been bold;
But merely for a prisoned heart's release;
Careful; I humble me now before thy feet:
Whate'er I be; I cry; and will not cease
Let me not perish; though favour be not meet。

15。

For; what I seek thou knowest I must find;
Or miserably die for lack of love。
I justify thee: what is in thy mind;
If it be shame to me; all shame above。
Thou know'st I choose itknow'st I would not shove
The hand away that stripped me for the rod
If so it pleased my Life; my love…made…angry God。

16。

I see a door; a multitude near by;
In creed and quarrel; sure disciples all!
Gladly they would; they say; enter the hall;
But cannot; the stone threshold is so high。
》From unseen hand; full many a feeding crumb;
Slow dropping o'er the threshold high doth come:
They gather and eat; with much disputing hum。

17。

Still and anon; a loud clear voice doth call
〃Make your feet clean; and enter so the hall。〃
They hear; they stoop; they gather each a crumb。
Oh the deaf people! would they were also dumb!
Hear how they talk; and lack of Christ deplore;
Stamping with muddy feet about the door;
And will not wipe them clean to walk upon his floor!

18。

But see; one comes; he listens to the voice;
Careful he wipes his weary dusty feet!
The voice hath spokento him is left no choice;
He hurries to obeythat only is meet。
Low sinks the threshold; levelled with the ground;
The man leaps into liberty he's bound。
The rest go talking; walking; picking round。

19。

If I; thus writing; rebuke my neighbour dull;
And talk; and write; and enter not the door;
Than all the rest I wrong Christ tenfold more;
Making his gift of vision void and null。
Help me this day to be thy humble sheep;
Eating thy grass; and following; thou before;
》From wolfish lies my life; O Shepherd; keep。

20。

God; help me; dull of heart; to trust in thee。
Thou art the father of menot any mood
Can part me from the One; the verily Good。
When fog and failure o'er my being brood。
When life looks but a glimmering marshy clod;
No fire out flashing from the living God
Then; then; to rest in faith were worthy victory!

21。

To trust is gain and growth; not mere sown seed!
Faith heaves the world round to the heavenly dawn;
In whose great light the soul doth spell and read
Itself high…born; its being derived and drawn
》From the eternal self…existent fire;
Then; mazed with joy of its own heavenly breed;
Exultant…humble falls before its awful sire。

22。

Art thou not; Jesus; busy like to us?
Thee shall I image as one sitting still;
Ordering all things in thy potent will;
Silent; and thinking ever to thy father;
Whose thought through thee flows multitudinous?
Or shall I think of thee as journeying; rather;
Ceaseless through space; because thou everything dost fill?

23。

That all things thou dost fill; I well may think
Thy power doth reach me in so many ways。
Thou who in one the universe dost bind;
Passest through all the channels of my mind;
The sun of thought; across the farthest brink
Of consciousness thou sendest me thy rays;
Nor drawest them in when lost in sleep I sink。

24。

So common are thy paths; thy coming seems
Only another phase oft of my me;
But nearer is my I; O Lord; to thee;
Than is my I to what itself it deems;
How better then couldst thou; O master; come;
Than from thy home across into my home;
Straight o'er the marches that I cannot see!

25。

Marches?'Twixt thee and me there's no division;
Except the meeting of thy will and mine;
The loves that love; the wills that will the same。
Where thine meets mine is my life's true condition;
Yea; only there it burns with any flame。
Thy will but holds me to my life's fruition。
O God; I wouldI have no mine that is not thine。

26。

I look for thee; and do not see thee come。
If I could see thee; 'twere a commoner thing;
And shallower comfort would thy coming bring。
Earth; sea; and air lie round me moveless dumb;
Never a tremble; an expectant hum;
To tell the Lord of Hearts is drawing near:
Lo! in the looking eyes; the looked for Lord is here。

27。

I take a comfort from my very badness:
It is for lack of thee that I am bad。
How close; how infinitely closer yet
Must I come to thee; ere I can pay one debt
Which mere humanity has on me set!
〃How close to thee!〃no wonder; soul; thou art glad!
Oneness with him is the eternal gladness。

28。

What can there be so close as making and made?
Nought twinned can be so near; thou art more nigh
To me; my God; than is this thinking I
To that I mean when I by me is said;
Thou art more near me; than is my ready will
Near to my love; though both one place do fill;
Yet; till we are one;Ah me! the long until!

29。

Then shall my heart behold thee everywhere。
The vision rises of a speechless thing;
A perfectness of bliss beyond compare!
A time when I nor breathe nor think nor move;
But I do breathe and think and feel thy love;
The soul of all the songs the saints do sing!
And life dies out in bliss; to come again in prayer。

30。

In the great glow of that great love; this death
Would melt away like a fantastic cloud;
I should no more shrink from it than from the breath
That makes in the frosty air a nimbus…shroud;
Thou; Love; hast conquered death; and I aloud
Should triumph over him; with thy saintly crowd;
That where the Lamb goes ever followeth。





MAY。

1。

WHAT though my words glance sideways from the thing
Which I would utter in thine ear; my sire!
Truth in the inward parts thou dost desire
Wise hunger; not a fitness fine of speech:
The little child that clamouring fails to reach
With upstretched hand the fringe of her attire;
Yet meets the mother's hand down hurrying。

2。

Even when their foolish words they turned on him;
He did not his disciples send away;
He knew their hearts were foolish; eyes were dim;
And therefore by his side needs must they stay。
Thou will not; Lord; send me away from thee。
When I am foolish; make thy cock crow grim;
If that is not enough; turn; Lord; and look on me。

3。

Another day of gloom and slanting rain!
Of closed skies; cold winds; and blight and bane!
Such not the weather; Lord; which thou art fain
To give thy chosen; sweet to heart and brain!
Until we mourn; thou keep'st the merry tune;
Thy hand unloved its pleasure must restrain;
Nor spoil both gift and child by lavishing too soon。

4。

But all things shall be ours! Up; heart; and sing。
All things were made for uswe are God's heirs
Moon; sun; and wildest comets that do trail
A crowd of small worlds for a swiftness…tail!
Up from Thy depths in me; my child…heart bring
The child alone inherits anything:
God's little children…godsall things are theirs!

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